Theory of Everything (part 3)

(part 1) (part 2)

Albert Einstein said what he wanted to know, what he wanted to see was the mind of God. He tried for the last years of his life trying to find the theory of everything. But maybe you can’t make a theory of everything. That there will always be unknowns (and unknown unknowns?), and perhaps there might even be unknowables. God knows. Yes. The myth of the Jews, that their God is omniscient, knowing even the future, knowing every subtlety of the human soul… Indeed, we know a prophet is true is if he opens up that vista to the rest of us, at least a peek of that inexhaustible light.

I dream of a Heaven where Joan of Arc sings the blues. I’d be on keyboards, though I don’t know keyboards; maybe I should learn them before I die. Together, we would lead all the mortals entering Heaven in a one time rendition of the song “love, baby”, which we will make up on the spot. And the angels would be flying around making it happen. Orchestration, musical instruments, sound effects, to merge and split the rhythm, billions and then handfuls of threads of song happening in parallel, for one time to thank our Lord respectably. As our Lord for once just kicks back and lets us give back, proper.

How else shall I thank my Lord, do you think? I have been carried off by the strong winds of the weird, then dropped from the whirlwind scarce knowing how to live again. This time… this time I will not go back. When the fugue takes over, I am not the same person. What I have of value are not of the ordinary day; what is gold, compared to honor? And then I am left back onto the normal shores, to assimilate again into what was, before: “Sunrise, sunset. Sunrise, sunset.” [this from Fiddler on the roof really speaks to me] Unless… am I given now to bring that world, this outside comprehension into the humdrum, to find the saint’s path even in the hustle and bustle? to give myself completely to the faith I have been told about by the larger voices? To love, no matter what. To love beyond my means…

Now that everyone is a Jew [see parts previous], what does it mean that Joshua of Nazareth is the Messiah (same word as Christ, remember)? I’ve read some Jewish (traditional Judaism) reasoning about why they don’t believe that Josh is, or was, that messiah they’d all been waiting for. Even back then it had been a long wait for one. The biggest one seems to be that they expect a man, just a man, not some demigod, that would show up given certain conditions in the world. And next would be that he would lead that world from the vantage point of Israel (which then would now be the tippy top of all the nations). And to this I might remark, yes, because God always does exactly what we expect Him to do, all the time, right? Yes, sarcasm. But there is one thing about the Jews: this world is not fundamentally based on a Christian paradigm of how things are: it is indeed in its marrow a specifically Jewish one. As in, the tradition that has been carried lo these centuries by those who identified themselves as “the Chosen”. Jesus is a Jew. That’s one reason he prefers “Josh Messiah” over “Jesus Christ”.

Why is it Josh which is the Messiah? Because it turns out that running the entire world (not to mention the totality of the universe, seen and unseen)—it takes a little more from that leader than someone who is just a man, if a very capable man. And the name might be a dead giveaway: not Josh, but Immanuel, meaning, “God with us”. At least, if the Christians are right about that interpretation of the book of Isaiah. You do not get what this means: put upon His shoulder the weight of the world, and He offers up His other shoulder. He’s not human. At the lowest point in His life, just as He were to die, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”—that’s scripture He’s quoting, Psalm 22:1. Even then. Not to mention that He asked the Father to forgive the people who were killing Him, for they knew not what they did. “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.” [John 1:5 NRSV]

I was awakened one morning with a vision. The night before had been rather epic, angels fighting angels and such juicy bits, but what came upon me that morning… it was like a movie, playing just for me, my mind’s eye and imagination and hallucination and God-given scenery of the weirdest degree, and it was verily a singular vision. There was a voiceover that told me that what I was seeing was about to happen on the earth: a city will come out from the ground where the centers of the old city (New York) had been occupying. And the voice told me it would become clear, these visions I was hopping from, one place to another, who is on who’s side, and the people—it was so strange. It was like everyone were dressed in the full body armor from the video game Halo, but some also dressed in a suit to top that off. I imagined that that was how normal person would look to me when I could “see” more accurately, a gift that was going to be given me. To see who was a good guy vs. a bad guy. And the voice describing what I was seeing, scenes from an unknown city, watching all those people in the Halo armor. And I was told what it meant for me in the real world: I was going to have to run from New York to Pittsburgh, while naked, and no one was supposed to see me along the way.

The reasons were complicated, why. I had gone to Carnegie Mellon, and I lived in New York. But something about finding something where I had last lived in Pittsburgh and related the thing I had with Joan of Arc (madly in love with), this was fate coming in upon me. So I take off my clothes, right? Yeah. I live underground, split level apartment, so I climb the spiral stair to the 1st floor. My roommate appears to be sleeping. I open the apartment door out and it is morning outside, I look to my right. Hm. I can’t be seen. Then a rustle from my left: neighbor making awake noises. There is a guide with me, above me in my mind, she tells me to go back down, so I do. So far so good.

OK, so I can try again, up the spiral stair, roommate still seems asleep. Out the apartment door, look left and no stirring anymore. But when I look right, it’s day, people moving about, some with purpose. My guide says if it looks like people will see you, make another attempt when it is night. So I go downstairs, and then this weird setup in my mind’s eye becomes more like normal (which is not like what you in general would think is normal). I am told that the immediate consequence of my performance is that we got an extra day before this apocalypse would come. My guide is a she, that’s all I know, and apparently she made one, slight, forgivable misstep. Really, minor. But compared to perfect it just glares, unfortunately. That was what they said about what I’d just done. Perfect.

Turns out there was a reason everybody looked the way they did. Josh once told me that we’d have 30-50 thousand years from now to the Apocalypse, proper. Those armored beings were now what the human populace looked like, 40,000 years in the future. Fascinating. I have quite the shakiest of grasps upon that situation. But if my perception is true, then the stream is from A.D. 40,000, and men still wear suits! I did too see it. I’ve seen stuff that would turn you white. And they say that God talked to Moses like talking to a confidant, while other prophets He gave note in the form of riddles. Suffice it to say, He talks to me in riddles. [emoticon here] So in other words, I have some idea of some things which may or may not flow into and out of meaning. And a few things I know that are surer than time passing.

But what is meant to be? Not in first, the normal way (how significant something is), but what every fool knows: the feeling of how you thought it worked this way and it didn’t, and why don’t things work the way I want them to when I need them too? Not meant to be, no? In this world, this footstool of a realm (YHVH has said it is), it is ours to toil over. In our years, what we have made: we have made machines to effect brute transfers in the realm of the solidities. Even the will of our Adonai (LORD) is not done on earth, else why would we pray “on earth as it is in heaven” in the Our Father?

You might imagine Heaven to be a realm full of transcendent images, sounds sweeter than any note ever took on earth. Indeed, as Bob Marley said, “Most people think, / Great God will come from the skies, / Take away everything / And make everybody feel high. / But if you know what life is worth, / You will look for yours on earth / And now you see the light, / You stand up for your rights. Jah!” Instead of a fluffy, ethereal place, instead I beheld a Heaven that was the height of practicality. Imagine Central Park where everything goes right. Like no one ever misthrew a frisbee. It’s that things there are like the things here, but everything turns out good up there. Thanks to the actions of Josh on earth, when He was here, now it all does turn out good, for all of us, anywhere—at the end. There is a Judgement. It is a good thing.

(last part)

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